4 Things Men Want in a Wife
By Aesha Adams-Roberts
One of the most common questions I get asked by our readers and clients is "what do men want?" In one form or another, whether the question is from a single sister still searching for Mr. Right, a jaded online dater who is tired of the games men play, a woman who is already in a relationship with a man and is trying to figure him out, or a sister who is already married, it seems they all want to know how to get inside a man's mind and understand exactly what he wants.
But there was something my mentor said to me the other day that made me realize that whether single or married, it's important to learn–and keep learning–what men want in a wife.
She said: "The role of husband and wife is not one of mentoring." In other words, a man isn't looking for someone who is trying to lead him, change him, or even criticize him. Even if and when he wants advice and counsel from his wife, he's looking for it without judgement.
Single men who are actively dating and looking for a woman he can commit to (and even the guys who don't realize they're looking for committment until it knocks them over the head) look for key things before they decide to settle down. Let's talk about four of them:
1) He wants to feel needed without feeling like his woman is "needy." Many men appreciate a woman who is independent but he doesn't want her so independent that she doesn't need him. This fulfills his innate desire to provide. And we're not just talking about finances here! Many men are fine with a woman who makes more than he does, as long as she still lets him know she needs him in her life. Men want to know that they fill some type of need in your life–emotionally, financially, spiritually.
2) He wants to feel wanted. You've probably heard that women's number one need is affection and men's number one need is sex. Most women roll their eyes when they hear this, but there's a significant reason to why he wants sex. After you say "I do," your man wants to feel desired by you! He wants to feel like he rocks your world.
3) He wants you to look good. And not because he's interested in a trophy wife. When you take the time to look good for him, it fulfills his need to feel desired and wanted.
4) He wants a cheerleader. Guys will rarely admit to you–or anyone else for that matter–that they often feel very insecure. This insecurity, I believe, comes about from social programming they've been through about what it means to be a man. The woman who can make him feel like a hero even when he doesn't think he is, will be a woman he wants to be with forever!
To find out more secrets on what men want from a woman, I've written a free eBook on this subject called 10 Things Your Husband Wishes You Knew (And Your Future Husband Hopes You Find Out), interviewed men in the eBook and MP3, What Men Think About Love and Marriage, and written several articles on our site on this subject. My advice to you is to read them, study them, and read them again because knowing what a man wants and needs is a powerful key to catching a man's eye and keeping his heart!