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How Much Homework Should You Do Before A First Date? #RelationshipRant

By: Aesha Adams Roberts

How much homework should you do before a first date? That was the topic of a recent #RelationshipRant Roundtable I participated in on Twitter a few weeks ago. Relationship experts and single women around the world weighed in on the topic and asked questions like: Should you Google the person before the first date? What might their Facebook profile or Twitter reveal about who this person is? Should you even go so far as to do a background check on the person to stay safe in online dating?

You wouldn't believe the horror stories I heard at this virtual roundtable! One woman found out her date was married with kids by looking at Facebook pictures; others thought it was suspicious if a person didn't have any social media profiles at all. I shared how I spent time as a freelancer earlier this year and saw several guys looking to hire someone to manage their online dating profiles. The job included sending emails to several women all at once; the guys had specific details on the type of woman they wanted to talk to and strict guidelines on what should be in those emails. Can you say UGH?! 

A horrifying story I heard just yesterday from a woman looking for her Mr. Right made the Mother Bear in me ROAR!  She was dating a man for over a year before finding out he was engaged to be married. He'd bought a ring, sent out Save The Date cards and was in the middle of pre-marital counseling with another woman all while trying to convince his girlfriend to move in with him!  When she vented to her friends, they told her to Google his name to see if he showed up on one of those "Don't Date Him" websites. Sure enough, the first listing in Google was a site filled with stories from women who had been burned by him; the next listing was his wedding registry to his current fiancé! 

I'm convinced that online dating is an amazing way for people to connect, find their soulmate and grow a lasting relationship. However, I also believe that one needs to be an INTERNET COP to stay safe and weed through the bad guys (and fake girls) quickly. That's why I put together an eBook to help online daters have better first dates and help finding their soul mates. (Click here to check it out).

So what do you think? How much homework should you do before a first date? Do you have a dating horror story to tell? Share your thoughts below!