Are You Too Busy For A Relationship? By: Aesha Adams-Roberts Tammy was a smart, goal-oriented, successful woman with a great career and a new boyfriend who loved her. However, he was about to break up with her because she was too busy. According to her boyfriend, when they were planning dates she'd say things like, "I have a dinner with my friends on Monday, volleyball on Tuesday, church on Friday, work on Saturday and I'm volunteering on Sunday. Oh, I'm free on Wednesday. . . want to get together then?" He broke up with her because she was too busy and made him feel like he was number 50 on her priorities list. Rachel was an ambitious, driven woman in her 40s. I listened to her share how her marriage fell apart because she put all of her energy into her dream job. She reflected on where things went wrong: "I shouldn't have gotten married anyway. Marriage was one of the goals I had on my checklist of things to accomplish in my 30s. I didn't put enough energy into building the relationship. You can't have your dream job and your dream man…" Kisha's story underscored that belief. She was only in her 20s and had already built a successful company. However, when she met her dream man, she decided to give it all up for love so she could focus on her new marriage. Less than a week before her wedding, she called it off to avoid making a big mistake. Now she was without a husband or a career! Tammy, Rachel and Kisha have all struggled with cultural messages about women, work and love. Everyone...
Read More
Share
5 Ways to Keep the Spark Alive In Your Marriage By: Aesha Adams-Roberts I recently read a shocking statistic about marriage in a post from the New York Times: According to research, the passion and happiness a couple feels after they say “I do” typically only lasts two years. As a happy wife who has been married for 7 years I can confidently say that it doesn’t have to be this way! Research in the science of love reveals that it’s really simple to keep the spark alive in your marriage. I’ve boiled it down to5 simple practices that can take as little as 5 minutes per day. You’re probably doing some or all of these things already, but when we do them with purpose and intention they become powerful! 5 Ways to Keep the Spark Alive In Your Marriage 1) Appreciation: Look for new things to appreciate about your husband. For example, watch him for 48 hours and then say, “I love watching you (fill in the blank with something amazing about your husband).” This will help you see him in new ways and make him feel loved and valued. 2) Spontaneity: I admit that this is a challenge for me, given the way that I love to plan everything. However, I experienced how amazing it can be to do things on the spur of the moment when my husband arranged a double date complete with a sitter in a matter of hours and whisked me away to enjoy a fun date night! 3) Novelty: Simply doing something in a new way can re-ignite the passion in...
Read More
Share
7 Hot Valentine's Day Date Ideas For Couples By: Aesha Adams-Roberts Valentine's Day is around the corner! If you want to break out of the boring dinner and movie rut, here are 7 hot valentine's day date ideas for couples that I put together just for you! 1. Take a Trip Around The World Prepare a meal inspired by another part of the world (Mexico, China, Jamaica, etc). Add in some music, a movie, and decorations and you and your partner can take a mini vacation in the comfort of your own home! 2. Hot & Steamy Texting If you and your sweetie have to be apart on Valentine's Day, keep things spicy with this fun app for couples: Avocdo let's you send pictures, flirt and more! 3. Board Games Baby it's cold outside but it doesn't have to be inside! Grab a sexy board game designed just for couples to heat things up. Check out this list of 75 games from the Dating Divas for some ideas http://www.thedatingdivas.com/romantic-rendezvous/75-sexy-bedroom-games-round-up/ 4. Kissing Games Get a book of "Kiss Me Coupons" and test out as many types of kisses as you can. 5. Table for Two Get dressed up . . . and stay home! Make a menu, get out the tablecloth, china & candles and have an amazing, romantic dinner at home! 6. Serenade Your Sweetie Sing a romantic song to your lover at a karaoke bar or record yourself singing a song using an app like SoundCloud. Then, send the link to your valentine as a sweet surprise. 7. My Funny Valentine Science has shown that couples who LAUGH together, stay together! Go out to a...
Read More
Share
3 Questions To Ask On A First Date By: Aesha Adams-Roberts If you want to find your soulmate, you have to get good at mastering the first date! I know first dates can range from awkward to disastrous, especially if you don't know what to talk about it! I've already shared the things women do that create disconnects during a first date (click here to read it if you missed it) and I've also written about awkward first dates and what to do about them. Let me help make dating easier, less nerve-wrecking, and more fun by sharing 3 questions to ask on a first date. These simple, yet powerful questions will help you make deeper connections with your date and help you instantly discover whether or not the man you're talking to is relationship material. 1. If you want to discover if he's the relationship–type you could ask: "What was the longest relationship you've ever had?" If he vents about his ex all night, you'll know he's not quite ready for a loving relationship with you. If he's NEVER had a long-term relationship, it could be a red flag that he doesn't know how to commit. If he's nostalgic about a past lover, don't get offended. It could be a sign he knows how to start and maintain a serious relationship. 2. If you want to find out what his core values are, you could ask: "What was the biggest decision you've ever made?" You can find out a lot about a person by how they make important decisions. You'll discover if he's a risk-taker or if he's more of a...
Read More
Share
AeshaOnline TV Episode #8: What To Do When The Men In Your Town Suck By: Aesha Adams-Roberts Have you ever said, "There are no good men in my city!" I've heard women complain about the dating scene in their town from LA to New York and everywhere in between! How can this be? Have aliens abducted all the good men and placed them on planet Mars? NO! It can seem this way with the male to female ratios in some locations. However, there are ways to gain control of your dating life and find, attract and keep high-quality men right in your area. In this episode, I explain why the men in your city aren't dateable and what you can do as a smart, successful, savvy woman to stand out from the crowd and find your perfect partner. WATCH NOW!...
Read More
Share
The Secret to Getting Your Man To Listen To You . . . Without Nagging, Complaining, or Screaming! By Aesha Adams-Roberts I recently had a conversation with a beautiful, successful, single woman who has found the man of her dreams. As we talked about what was holding her back from marrying this man, (even though he wants to marry her), one of the things she said was, “whenever I try to talk with him, I can’t find the right words. So I just scream!” This sister is not alone. The fact is many women struggle with communicating. Whether it’s knowing what to say when first meeting a man, knowing what to talk about on a date, or communicating your needs in such a way that a man can’t help but fulfill them, few women know the secrets to getting a man to listen. Knowing how to communicate with other people is a key to success in life. And without good communication skills, the happiness in a relationship will not last long. Sadly, most people weren’t groomed with the kind of skills that make communication easy and fun. As a result, we often sound like 3 year olds who nag, complain, or scream when we don’t get our way. It's no wonder many men shut down when it’s time to have a serious talk with their woman. Let’s talk about how to communicate with your man in such a way that he wants to listen to you. Most women make the mistake of bringing up an important topic at the very moment they think about it. As one sister told me on Facebook: With men, timing is...
Read More
Share
AeshaOnline TV Episode #7: How To Find Your Perfect Partner By: Aesha Adams-Roberts As a dating coach, relationship expert and professional matchmaker, singles are always telling me their top "must-haves" in their ideal mate. Their perfect partner list include things like money, height and physical fitness. One woman told me she finds calloused hands & dirty shoes attractive in a man because it proves he knows how to work! However if what you're looking for is a 6-foot man with 6-pack abs and 6-figure salary, you may be selling yourself short! In this powerful episode, I share how tweaking this ONE thing on your ideal mate list can help you find your fantasy man faster. Click here to WATCH NOW! P.S. Please share this video with your friends & share your "aha-moments" in a comment below! ...
Read More
Share
First Date Dealbreakers That Drive Men Away And How To Avoid Them By: Aesha Adams-Roberts I almost blew it with my dream man! We were going to lunch at Panera Bread and I was making small talk as we drove from campus to the restaurant. Although I was teaching at a university in the Midwest at the time, I had an interview for a position at a university in the South that was coming up and I mentioned it as we chatted. Before I met him, I was trying everything in my power to land my dream job in the South. But now things had changed. Even though we weren’t officially dating, I knew that he was the kind of man I had been looking for. I knew that I wasn’t going to take the job but I didn’t tell him that. When I brought up the interview he said, “So this job is just temporary? You’re not really planning on staying here, huh?” There must have been something in his voice that made me realize that how I’d respond to his question could either make or break my chances with him. I could tell that he was trying to find out whether or not it was worth it to pursue a relationship with me. In other words, if I was serious about moving and he had no desire for a long distance relationship, I might have become less desirable for him. Why even take time getting to know me if things wouldn’t work out anyway? I thought about my answer to his question very carefully. “Well, I used to really want...
Read More
Share
